We like to think of mistakes as lessons—stepping stones to improvement, shaping us into better decision-makers.
But if that were true, why do we keep making the same mistakes over and over again?
Why do we continue hitting snooze on our alarms, overspending on things we don’t need, or falling into the same unhealthy relationship patterns, despite knowing better?
It turns out, our brains are wired to repeat mistakes—not avoid them.
And this psychological trap is one of the biggest hidden obstacles to success.
The science behind this phenomenon is both surprising and counterintuitive, but understanding it could be the key to finally breaking free from repetitive failures.
The Hidden Science Behind Repeated Mistakes
We assume that making a mistake automatically teaches us not to make it again. But research suggests otherwise.
In reality, dwelling on our errors often leads to more mistakes. Instead of learning, we get trapped in a cycle of self-reproach and negative reinforcement.
For example, imagine you set a goal to save money for something important—a car, a vacation, or a house.
Yet, every night, you find yourself ordering takeout instead of cooking at home.
You’re fully aware that this habit is draining your bank account, yet you keep doing it anyway.
Why? Because each time you recognize your mistake, your brain slows down to analyze it—locking in the behavior instead of correcting it.
The impact of repeated mistakes isn’t limited to everyday frustrations.
In the medical field, repeated errors are the third leading cause of death in the U.S.
And for lawyers, small, repeated mistakes are the number one reason they get sued for malpractice.
Clearly, these patterns can have serious consequences, so why are they so hard to break?
Why Reflection Can Backfire
When confronted with a mistake, our brain instinctively tries to understand what went wrong.
While this might sound beneficial, the problem is that this process reinforces failure instead of guiding us toward success.
A study published in The Journal of Neuroscience found that when people focus too much on why they made a mistake, it strengthens the neural pathways associated with that error.
Essentially, dwelling on mistakes encodes them deeper into our habits. The more we stress over a mistake, the more likely we are to repeat it.
Psychologists call this the “error-monitoring system”—a built-in mechanism that makes us painfully aware of our screw-ups.
But instead of leading to self-improvement, this system often backfires by triggering guilt, frustration, and self-doubt.
And what do people do when they feel bad? They seek comfort—even if that comfort comes from repeating the very mistake they’re trying to avoid.
This is why people who try to quit smoking often relapse after one cigarette.
Instead of simply moving on, they feel so guilty about slipping up that they think, Well, I already failed today. Might as well have another one.
This “what-the-hell effect” is a direct result of our brain’s error-monitoring system working against us.
The Psychology of Error Correction
So if overanalyzing our mistakes keeps us trapped in them, what’s the alternative? Instead of focusing on the mistake, we should focus on the correction.
Let’s go back to the example of overspending on takeout.
Rather than beating yourself up over the money you wasted last month, shift your focus to a concrete solution: “Tonight, I’ll cook a homemade meal.”
Small, action-based adjustments like this retrain your brain to focus on progress rather than failure.
In a study conducted at the University of Michigan, researchers found that people who responded to mistakes with self-compassion rather than self-criticism were significantly more likely to break bad habits.
Instead of dwelling on past failures, they saw each mistake as a temporary setback rather than a personal flaw.
Here’s how to apply this mindset in real life:
- Identify one small change instead of trying to fix everything at once.
- Replace self-criticism with self-correction. Instead of “I always mess up,” try “Next time, I’ll do this differently.”
- Interrupt the cycle. If you always reach for your phone before bed, put it in another room. If you keep skipping workouts, leave your gym clothes next to your bed. Make it easier to do the right thing than the wrong one.
The Unexpected Power of Letting Go
One of the biggest myths about self-improvement is that we need to analyze our mistakes to learn from them.
But in reality, fixating on mistakes does more harm than good.
By shifting your focus from past failures to present solutions, you train your brain to move forward instead of staying stuck.
So the next time you catch yourself repeating a mistake, don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, ask yourself: What’s one small thing I can do differently right now?
That single shift in perspective might just be the key to finally breaking free from the cycle of failure—for good.
